A husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standing in front of a full-length mirror taking a hard look at herself. "You know, dear," she says, "I look in the mirror, and I see an old woman. ©OFFICEJOKES.NET

My face is all wrinkled, my boobs are barely above my waist, and my butt is hanging out a mile. I've got fat legs, and my arms are all flabby." ©OFFICEJOKES.NET

She turns to her husband and says, "Tell me something positive to make me feel better about myself." ©OFFICEJOKES.NET

He studies hard for a moment thinking about it and then says in a soft, thoughtful voice, "Well, ... there's nothing wrong with your eyesight." ©OFFICEJOKES.NET

Services for the husband will be held Saturday morning at 10:30 at St. Anselm's Memorial Chapel. Female friends of the family are invited .