It is well documented that for every minute that you exercise, you add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month.
My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she's 97 years old and we don't know where the hell she is.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.©OFFICEJOKES.NET

And last but not least: I don't exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.